With a pace designed to induce seizures,
this atomic wedgie of a trailer grabs you by the belt loops and screams,
“Wake up & smell the jazz hands!”
The Six Characters
trailer was edited together from eight World Tours at 164 venues, including
Carnegie Hall, the Hollywood Bowl, Mount Rushmore, The Copacabana, Igor's
Gas 'n Sip Danemark, and Wimbledon (command performance for the Queen
Mum.)
We tried
to skim the creamiest moments from the road, and discard the chunks—most
significantly our cold reception opening for Don Knotts on his spoken
word tour in the summer of '89 (To those we disappointed, we say only
this: We’re sorry your slack-jawed, bookstore-coffee-swilling, Aunt
Bea-loving asses couldn’t appreciate our virtuosity! You may have
assaulted us with bags of stale scones, but our wounds will heal and,
with the aid plastic surgery, disappear. You will remain artless plebes
'till you DIE!!!).
But on the
whole, our experiences were positive. We returned from the road 40 lbs
heavier, 37% gayer, and ¾ less responsible for our actions (shout
out to our 18 illegitimate children. We may not be there for you—ever—but
we’ll always remember the nights of hard drinking that led to your
conception! Be cool, stay in school!), and 200% readier to rock our audiences
steadily and groovily.
Huge thanks to all the acts we opened for, including:
Elton John
Rush
Sean Connery as Medicine Man
The All-New Cher
Rowdy Roddy Piper
Carrot Top
And all those who opened for us:
Def Leppard
We appreciate your efforts at greatness, and accept your
apologies.